theme faithful

It has been a really rough week  month for me,  I'm tired of being sick and tired and that little pesky defeat thing just always finds a way to creep in. I am desperately seeking redemption from the extreme guilt I am carrying around. Like hello God JUST did a whole pile of miracles on my behalf . I am thankful for these miracles but apparently that's not good enough for me. He just rescued me when I felt like I could go no farther, showing me His never ending faithfulness and devotion to me and I want more..


This is kind of embarrassing to say but I will do it anyway. It's kind of like ok thank you God but um I'm not content because yeah you enabled my treatments and all that but you didn't take it away and that is what I REALLY wanted so I am going to go visit pity party land again instead of rejoicing in your devotion.


The level of devotion here is obviously not equal. I struggle and fail. My heart needs some work I would say but faith abounds with Jesus and He is pretty darn good at changing hearts. There is hope.





 I opened up my prayer journal in desperate need of Jesus to put these shattered pieces of my heart and life back together and this is the page I opened up to: I have no more words.